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Anxiety and Self-Worth

7/14/2020

6 Comments

 
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No wonder by the time we are in our 30's and 40's we suddenly start to feel anxiety that we never experienced before! The snowball has grown!!!
Last week I shared a blog about how Self-Worth (SW) is, to me, at the core of so much of who we are. It can have such a positive or negative impact on our lives, depending on how we see our worth and how that leads us to show up in every aspect of our lives. Over the next few weeks I’m going to share some thoughts on how the problem of not developing your SW shows up in so many different ways, for many different people.

Today we’re starting with ANXIETY because that is surely something most of us know at least a little bit about! (I also wrote about anxiety a few weeks back if you want to take a look at different symptoms and how it shows up for everyone differently). 


So, how could Self-Worth be impacting your anxiety levels? 

Here’s my theory: Anxiety is a snowball- not a single event. That means every time in life that you have been given the message that something, whether physically or emotionally, could be dangerous or potentially hurtful, your brain sends you a message to be aware, concerned, or ready to implement that fight-flight-freeze response if necessary. Anxiety is your brain’s alarm system that something could hurt you. 

When events that have caused the alarm to go off aren’t properly processed, your brain ties those feelings to the memory forever because it doesn’t know what else to do with them. It just stockpiles the emotion. It starts a snowball. Properly processing the events means that by the end of the day, you have accepted that you are safe, you aren’t at fault, and that your worth hasn’t changed based on the day’s events. 
​

I’m not just talking about severely traumatic events (although those definitely contribute here). I’m talking about tripping on stage in front of the entire elementary school, middle school mean girl run-ins, subtle messages from family that you are worthless, boyfriends cheating, failing tests. All of these experiences are emotionally unsafe. 

Our brains are wired to protect us. Unfortunately, sometimes we hold on to emotions that we need to let go of. As the emotions build from each of these events they cause “Negative Core Beliefs” to form about yourself such as: 
I’m not good enough (probably the most common I see in women) 
It’s unsafe to share emotions
I’m a failure
I’m bad
I’m alone

Once we establish a negative core belief, every time something happens (again, big or small) that sets off our alarm and FEELS similar, it gets added to the anxiety snowball. So in the moment when you are sitting in your boss’ office, getting a bad annual review and you can feel your breathing get shallow and your hands start to sweat- you aren’t just experiencing the stress from that moment. You are feeling the emotion from every unprocessed memory that has given you the feeling of your negative core belief (say in this case, “I’m being told I’m not good enough”). No wonder by the time we are in our 30’s and 40’s we suddenly start to feel anxiety that we never experienced before! The snowball has grown!!!

How does SW fit into this equation? Because your self-worth has been grounded in a serious belief that you aren’t good enough (or any of the others I listed above and countless others). That is where you are operating from on a daily basis now because of all these messages you have been given. 

One of the things I work with clients on in therapy is revisiting some of those major events that have contributed to the negative core belief and we reprocess them from a different lens- one of reclaiming your SW in that moment. You can look back on those moments and rewrite what you tell yourself you are worth on that day. As we go through and define your SW for yourself (not by what others told you on that day), the snowball diminishes. The anxiety melts away. 

It’s absolutely possible to redefine your self-worth and undo what was planted, even at a young age. If this sounds like the work you are finally interested in doing, I challenge you today to make the call. Contact me so we can start the journey of increasing your self-worth so we can get rid of that anxiety, once and for all!

-Julie



6 Comments
Tonia Anderson
6/16/2021 03:20:34 pm

Recovering your past lost relationship is now easy with the help of Lord Zakuza who brought back my partner back to me and I'm so blessed for that and I won't stop saying thank you till the end of time. For more infor about Lord Zakuza, WhatsApp: +1 740 573 9483, Email: lordzakuza7 @ gmail. com, Website: lordzakuzaspells.com

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Anny Robert
8/18/2021 05:05:35 am

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Mariam
2/11/2022 03:52:45 pm

I want to share my wonderful testimony how I got back my husband back, who I sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and I try to make things work for both of us yet things were getting worse and I love him so much and there is nothing I could do to get my husband back until I saw a testimony share by a woman called Lauren from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster who brought her husband back within 24 hours and I decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Lauren and I have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one I met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem I have no solution to, I introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems, and their problem were solve with the great help of DR Jumba, who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours. I am so happy that my husband is back to me again, and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong, every day is happiness and joy. and There is nothing like being with the man you love. I am so happy my love is back to me with the help of DR Jumba . if you have similar problem I will advise you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others you can also WhatsApp him +1(908) 517-4108 or Email him at : wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com or view his website for more review https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com

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cecillia hills
3/2/2022 11:25:15 am

BEST AND URGENT LOVE SPELL TO GET BACK WITH YOUR EX HUSBAND/WIFE THROUGH A POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER CALLED LORD ZULU CONTACT HIM NOW FOR YOUR TESTIMONIES. CONTACT HIM ON WHATSAPP NOW @+1(909) 781-4612. 
Hello everyone, my name is Cecilia Hills, I'm here to testify of a powerful love spell caster called lord Zulu, who helped me stabilize my relationship and solved all the problems that's been going on in my life. I was confused and devastated when my husband left me and my kids without a word, I needed him back because I love him so much, I told my friend about how he left me. So a friend of mine introduced me to this powerful and reliable spell caster who had helped her in getting her lover back, so I contacted him and he promised that in less than 24 hours he will come back to me. After I did all he asked, to my greatest surprise my husband who had refused to speak with me came to my house and asked for forgiveness for all he had made me go through and now we are living happily together, I will forever be grateful to you Lord Zulu if you have any relationship problem I will advise you to contact him now for your testimonies. Contact him on WhatsApp @+1(909) 781-4612. OR Email @ allsupremepowersolutionhome@gmail.com website: allsupremepowersolutionhom.website2.me

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EVA LELE
3/8/2022 03:46:54 am

HOW TO GET YOUR EX LOVER BACK & HOW I GOT MY EX LOVER. BACK I want to thank Dr Omokpo for saving my marriage. My husband treated me badly and left home for almost 3 month this got me sick and confused. Then I told my friend about how my husband has changed towards me. Then he told me to contact: {dromokpo@gmail.com}that he will help me bring my husband back to being a good man. That this great man helped her too.

Then I contacted him after 3 days of casting the spell my husband came back home to beg me for forgiveness and I forgive him but today we are living in joy and happiness If you are going through any relationship stress or broken marriage situation and you want your Ex lover, Ex boyfriend, Ex girlfriend or Divorced husband or wife back you reach him via: dromokpo@gmail.com

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Gloria thomas
3/29/2022 03:13:27 am

Hello everyone i want to testify of the great and powerful spell caster named Priest Jumba who brought back my ex who left me and got engaged to another girl,We where happy together when all of a sudden he just change he used to call me every morning and and night before going to bed but all that stopped when i call him he yell at me and told me he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore i was so sad and confused i didn't know what to do then i went online to search on how to get back my ex then i found an article where someone was talking about how the great and powerful Priest Jumba helped her and she left his email address i took it and contacted him i told him my problem he only smiled and told me to relax everything will be OK i did everything he asked me to do and he assured me that after 24hrs he will be back,To my greatest surprise the next morning it was my boyfriend he came back knelling and begging for me to accept him back now we are so happy together he can also help you contact him on wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com

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    ​Rich​
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    LCSW, Atlanta
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  • Home
  • About
    • Meet Julie
    • My Mission
    • In-Person & Virtual Counseling
  • Services
    • Therapy >
      • Anxiety Counseling
      • Trauma Therapy
      • Building Self-Worth
      • Christian Counseling
      • EMDR
    • Clinical Supervision
    • Fees
    • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Blog